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Kenrick Cleveland..'s Articles in Business

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Avoiding the Pack Mentality Yeah, I know, things are getting expensive. Grocery prices are soaring because gas prices are soaring because there's a war going on because a fear of scarcity has been instilled in us because . . . well, it's complicated, right? Regardless of the reasons, I get back to the point that things are expensive. Drinking from a Fire Hose Every year around this time, I start a new cycle of classes and as usual, I've got some eager, excited, anticipating students, many of whom will (I can already tell) work themselves into a bit of a frenzy wanting to soak up as much persuasion as possible in a short period of time. As one client put it, "I kind of feel like I'm drinking water out of a fire hose." The Brain and Persuasion "The existence of forgetting has never been proved: We only know that some things don't come to mind when we want them." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche Bound to Buy Binds are a fascinating technique which I love to use in persuasion and which should be used sparingly, adding seasoning to your arsenal of tools. The Unthinkable There's a bumper sticker I saw recently that said, "Don't believe everything you think." Ironically, I found this oddly thought provoking. Something about it resonated with me. There's something to the idea that thinking is a little bit overrated. Listen to This "It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes Working With Resonance Recently I heard an interesting story about the law of resonance. This law is similar to the law of attraction -- the universal law of like attracting like -- but not exactly the same. While attraction brings into your life what you're putting out, resonance is slightly different. The Persuasive Power of Focus If you're anything like me, your life is full of distractions. From every direction we are bombarded with one thing or another. Just in the course of this paragraph, I've had one 'new e-mail' alert, some instant messages from my assistant, in the other room I can hear my kids arguing over the remote, my dog wants to go for a walk, I'm a little thirsty, the phone will ring any second. . . One simple paragraph can be exhausting in light of all the other things that are vying for attention. Enlarging the Frames "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances - to choose one's own way." - Victor Frankl Attaining Persuasive Productivity One of the bonuses of learning to persuade is that we have the ability to work our skills on ourselves. When we apply self-persuasion, we can naturally accomplish anything we set our minds to. Reframing Habits Habits... they come in all forms. Most people think of habits as the irritating things you wish you didn't "have" to do, fingernail biting, knuckle cracking, compulsive snacking, cigarette smoking. Of course smoking is more of a psychological/physical need that is satisfied by another cigarette, so is a little bit more than a habit. Victim No More "Thou shalt not be a victim. Thou shalt not be a perpetrator. Above all, thou shalt not be a bystander." --Holocaust Museum, Washington, DC Cleaning Up Your Language: Persuasive Oration Language, like persuasion, is an art. It's an art that can be mangled, yes. And as with any art, unless you're a prodigy, as Mozart was with music, as H.P. Lovecraft was with poetry, as Pablo Picasso was with painting, then most likely you will have to practice to be good at the art of language. The Best Frame Wins Has this ever happened to you? You're driving down the freeway, maybe a little too fast, maybe not, and those red and blue lights begin to flash in your rear view mirror. So you pull over and prepare your papers. . . license, registration, proof of insurance. And the law enforcement officer makes his way to your window, quickly so as to not waste your time, and politely says, 'Hi. . .I'm just wondering if you . . .I'm so sorry to bother you. But would you mind showing me your license and registration? I think there might have been a slight infraction of the law and I'd really like to clear it up if you don't mind. I'm so sorry for the inconvenience.' Intrinsically Linked: Rapport and Criteria "You will make more friends in a week by getting yourself interested in other people than you can in a year by trying to get other people interested in you." --Arnold Bennett auditory persuasion As you listen to what I'm going to tell you, you'll begin to hear the way in which you can use these words to describe most anything. You can orient your phrases and the way in which you talk such that people will resonate with what you're saying very well. If you make your voice calm and smooth you'll probably have an even greater appeal as you verbalize the message you want to get across. You can tune in to what people are telling you as well, becoming more empathic with them and helping them to understand exactly your meaning to all the words that you have. going the extra mile for your affluent clientle I read a story about the Ritz Carlton Hotel recently that has me thinking about what it means to truly court and cater to an affluent clientle in a way that will keep them interested and involved with your product or service. further adventures in organization If you're anything like me, you're a very busy person. Not only am I busy with regular things--teaching, family, health maintenance--I'm also in the midst of a moving, requiring an added list of what needs to be done. It's hard to believe how much has to be done in a day and because this is on my mind, I'm inspired to write more on the topic of organization as I believe it has helped keep me on even footing in a time of change. big softy There's something I'm curious about. . . persuading personally In all cultures there are certain rules and norms which citizens are expected to adhere to. This is particularly true in "polite society" and business contexts. And while I appreciate the value of rules and norms as a guideline, I always felt some were meant to be bent, if not broken entirely. Cultivating Curiosity I recently came across the following list written/compiled by David Heenan: Ten Keys to Life Fulfillment: 1. Listen to your heart 2. Take one step at a time 3. Deliver daily 4. Maintain a maverick mind-set 5. Focus, focus, focus 6. Never stop learning 7. Build a brain trust (network of knowledgeable people) 8. Reinvent Yourself 9. Sell Yourself 10. Start now! Historical Frames "If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail." --Abraham H. Maslow Linguistical Pitfalls Part Two Seems like some of my readers are paying attention and that's awesome. I wrote part one of this article a while back. It talks about eight common and avoidable pitfalls we have in language. In the article I wrote about 'but', 'if', 'try', and 'might' and how these words dilute the power of our language and dull our ability to persuade. Well, a few of my more observant readers noticed that if there are eight pitfalls and I only cited four, there must be four more traps out there with the potential to hurt us. Some readers went so far as to suggest I did this to demonstrate another persuasive technique--open loops. The 'away' Perspective: Persuasion Continuum Of Towards And Away Before I get into the 'away' perspective in the towards/away continuum, I want to make a distinction between a truly negative personality and a person who is inclined towards moving away from a problem. Listening To Yourself With My Ears My students often request that I listen to their speeches and presentations to comment on what I see as their strengths and weaknesses in their persuasion skills. Unfortunately, I haven't discovered a way to exist without sleep and I don't have enough hours in a day to do everything that I want to do and everything that is requested of me. Persuasion Continuums Ii: Getting In Deeper In the first article of this series, "Persuasion Continuums" I started to describe one of the slickest persuasion tools around. I'm going to take it a little further here. Getting Touchy Feely Here's part three in the four part series of articles about the representational systems of communication. Previously I wrote an overview of the different systems and how we can use these to gain rapport for easier persuasion and then went into more detail about visual language. Well, with a title containing the words 'touchy feely' this can only be about kinesthetic language, words that describe things in a way so as to be touching and feeling. The Use Of Scapegoats In Persuasion Seems like for a while there nearly every car in the U.S. had a "United We Stand" bumper sticker. These stickers imply that our standing united was our only salvation. When we don't stand united, what happens? Of course, we fall divided. Hocus Pocus: Reframing Sugar I recently came across a banner ad on the internet that read: "Skip artificals. Go natural. Sugar: sweet by nature. Only 15 calories per teaspoon." How To Not Become Rich 1. Wait for approval from society, from your family, from your friends, from your colleagues. I Presuppose So At the core of presupposition is the idea that we can assume a mental position or thought which our prospects or clients must take for granted in order for everything else that we say to make sense without us actually having to name the core concept. Flexing Your Persuasion Muscles If you don't know it by now, I'm a changed man. My life and health have become drastically improved in the last few years by way of shedding 140+ pounds of fat, adopting a healthy relationship to food and learning to love the gym and exercise. Getting Into The Flow Of Affluence As a recent addition to my coaching club, I've added one-on-one calls. Together, my students and I have delved into all kinds of stuff from persuasion and affluence attraction to more spiritually oriented matters to, you name it. It's open, personal access in which my members come to me with things that maybe they're stuck on or things they just want to get better at. A Mile In Their Shoes Harper Lee wrote in "To Kill a Mockingbird", "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." We've all heard that you can't truly know someone until you walk a mile in his shoes. . . .well, this technique is another figurative exploration in working with the energy of our prospects. Begin By Beginning Persuasion is, at its core, the study of human nature. Human nature is sometimes predictable, sometimes not so predictable. We are complex organisms and even if all things were equal (environment, education, parenting, nutrition, finances) there would be some of us who would achieve and some of us who would not. Motivation Through Adversity I've struggled with my weight my whole life. As far back as I can remember, I've felt bad about it. I was stuck in a body that wasn't what I wanted, that didn't fit with how I really saw myself and to me, it represented a weakness. Andrew Carnegie once said, "People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents." In my heart and mind, I felt this struggle was keeping me from self mastery and frustrated the heck out of me. Persuasion Or Sneakiness? Recently a student of mine posted a comment about my use of the relationship between teacher and student in an example of presupposition. They suggested, with a wink and a smiley face, that maybe I was being a little sneaky in using the example in a persuasive way. Ways We Learn: Small Pieces Of Persuasion A student recently asked me, "Kenrick, how the heck do you keep track of all of the persuasion strategies you know? Each time we have a coaching call, it seems like you pull out some new strategy. I can't even remember the basics like using the unconscious hello. How can I remember to remember?' Kicking Negativity "Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." --Seneca, Roman philosopher, mid-1st century AD Rapid Rapport With Storytelling So say you're face to face with a brand new prospect. They've heard a little bit about you, your reputation, what kind of a person you are and yet, maybe they still have some defenses which you are going to need to overcome before rapport has been established and they can feel good trusting you completely. Organize The Clutter, Organize Your Mind "Three Rules of Work: Out of clutter find simplicity; From discord find harmony; In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity." -Albert Einstein Spare Parts: Segmenting Personality For Sales Persuasion 'A part of me really wants to buy your product.' What does 'a part of me' mean? When someone says, 'well, part of me wants this, but another part wants that', what is that person talking about? Well, one thing is, this is a way for us to talk about our experiences. Who's To Blame? "All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration. You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him, but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy." -Wayne Dyer Stratagem And Persuasion "So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you will win a hundred times in a hundred battles. If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you win one and lose the next. If you do not know yourself or your enemy, you will always lose." -Ancient Chinese Proverb Seeing The Light: Visual Systems Of Representation Representational systems, we all use them whether we're oriented visually, auditorily or kinesthetically. In previous articles, I've given an overview of VAK. These are the ways we view the world. There is tremendous value in gaining rapport with your affluent clients and prospects by focusing on their representational system. This article focuses our gaze on visual language. Persuasion And The Media "The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." -Friedrich Nietzsche The Structuring Of Reality "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy." -Tom Waits Don't Be A Sales Zombie Lately I've been updating my computer system. Again. And this requires occasional trips to the local computer chain store. For the most part, I'm in and out in a few minutes, knowing exactly what I want and need. But when I'm looking for a more expensive piece of equipment, I have an experience I call, "Attack of the Sales Zombies'. Obstacles Into Opportunities "It still holds true that man is most uniquely human when he turns obstacles into opportunities." --Eric Hoffer The Power Of Imagination "Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice." --Wayne Dyer The Relativity Of Luxury "The saddest thing I can imagine is to get used to luxury." --Charlie Chaplin Future Pace It Here's a bit of an advanced technique. It's called future pacing and it works to remind your prospect or client of all the reasons they made the decision to buy your product or service. It transfers all of these reasons to a future point in time and triggers your prospect to remember them when an anchor is fired off. Appealing To Emotions In Business This might, on the surface, sound a little out there, but here's something I find overrated: Rationality. Sure, sure, it's important to have a solid foundation, a base from which to work, feet planted firmly on the ground, and all that, but in business the idea of rationality has won out exclusively over all else. In my opinion, we've lost something in the transition from 'mom and pop' businesses to faceless corporations. An integral part of selling our products or services, especially when dealing with an affluent clientle, is our ability to reach them on an emotional level. The Double Edged Sword: Maintaining Boundaries In Rapport "It is the business of thought to define things, to find the boundaries; thought, indeed, is a ceaseless process of definition. It is the business of art to give things shape." -Vance Palmer Persuasion Metaphors From Around The World Many folks consider the concept of 'energy' to be somewhat new agey. Personally I consider it to be an integral part of understanding the self. And understanding ourselves, is absolutely the first step in learning to persuade. Using The Forbidden To Persuade 'Forbid us something, and that thing we desire.' - Geoffrey Chaucer Awareness Pattern In Persuasion "The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself." -Henry Miller A Linguistical Dance: Repetition In Threes "Rhythm is something you either have or don't have, and when you have it, you have it all over." -Elvis Presley Master Your Fears "Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear-not absence of fear."--Mark Twain Blame As Persuasion: Use With Caution I have written previously about the term 'everything happens for a reason' as a technique to utilize the inherent trust many people have in this concept. I also wrote about how superstition can be a powerful persuasive tool. If you've read those articles and put the tools to work in your life, you already understand the power they hold. Your Own Personal Genie: Creating Your Universe In Pictures Are there things in life that you have wanted but which have eluded you? Material things, physical attributes, human connections-that for one reason or another you've simply been unable to achieve? Adjusting Your Lens For Maximum Persuasion I've written about framing basics in previous articles. Framing is a vast subject and couldn't possibly be summed up in just a few articles, but it's a foundation. Resolutions It's that time of year again--time to recreate ourselves anew, time to create a map of what we want for ourselves, of ourselves, for the new year. I love this time of year because I love self improvement on any level. It's an optimistic time and a time when we realize that we have an incredible potential to create what we want. Calibrating For Rapport Back, twenty some years ago when I was selling gym memberships, there was a trainer who was a great guy, really funny and sociable, but he just never understood how to communicate with certain people. In a way, he was genuinely himself all the time, but on the other hand this often brought him right up against a wall where he was ineffective in his job. Relentlessly Yes! "All that man achieves, and all that he fails to achieve is a direct result of his own thoughts." -James Allen The Frame Of Beginning Beginnings are everywhere all the time. Everything has a beginning, middle and end. And when we begin with clarity and intention, it sets our path for what we can expect. Sitting down to start a presentation with a new client or prospect, how do you begin? Very Superstitious: 'there Are No Accidents' 'Very superstitious, writing's on the wall Very superstitious, ladders bout' to fall Thirteen month old baby, broke the lookin' glass Seven years of bad luck, the good things in your past The Edge: Persuade Using Our Ingrained Drive To Compete I noticed something interesting at the gym. The gym I go to is by no means a meat market. . . there are few mirrors, most of the patrons are really there to work out, not to see and be seen, the clientle, on the whole, seems to care about attaining or maintaining their health through exercise and that's their agenda as far as being there goes. Learning Persuasion I recently had a student ask me, "Kenrick, how do you keep track all of these persuasion strategies? Every time we have a call, you pull out another technique. Sometimes I can't even remember to use the 'unconscious hello'." Hopping Into Someone Else's Skin You've heard the saying; you can't know someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. This is a technique on how to gain rapport by jumping into another person, stepping in, sliding in, moving in, being in that person, figuratively walking a mile in their shoes. Harper Lee wrote in To Kill a Mockingbird, "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." Buyer's Remorse And How To Short Circuit It When making purchase large and small, it is human nature for us to want to make sure we've made sound and proper decisions with keen determination and an eye towards value and greatest use. How To Short Circuit Buyer's Remorse It's human nature to want to believe that we have done something of value when we make a purchase. We like to feel we've used proper sense and keen determination in choosing things that are going to be good for us and of the greatest use. And we most certainly want to know we'll feel good about the choices we've made in the long run. On Being Receptive To Our Prospect's Energy From time-to-time I like to bring up some concepts that might be considered a little woo woo. I ask your indulgence with this and suggest that if it works, even woo woo has value. Gut Check: Calibrating With Yourself The Oxford English Dictionary defines intuition as "the immediate apprehension of an object by the mind without the intervention of any reasoning process". Are You Full Of It? When we interact with prospects, especially an affluent clientle, we need to really show them what we're made of. Over-confidence, arrogance, cockiness, braggery. . .these are NOT good things to be full of. Self-assurance, competency, confidence, and self-value. . . are excellent things to be full of. Choosing a Talisman for Affluence Amulets have been used throughout the ages to protect the holder from trouble. Talismans are objects that bring luck. Both have been around since the dawn of man. Literally. I don't have proof, but I wholeheartedly believe that the first man ever saw a rock or shell and picked it up and thought to himself, 'This is a special item which will bring me luck and protect me from evil.' Isolation Last year I saw a documentary about the cult leader Jim Jones called "Jonestown: The Life And Death of People's Temple". It is the history of the murder/"suicide" of 913 members of the People's Temple in Guyana through photos, clips, recordings and interviews of surviving members. Persuasion Through Base Desires Persuasion has always been my passion. Self persuasion and self mastery have become extraordinarily important to me over the last year and a half. I have had some tremendous changes in my life as a result. Group Rapport: Shovel It Up and Filter It Out When I first started out in the persuasion business I would have huge anxiety for about a week before a big seminar. I was impossible to be around. My family would sequester themselves and avoid me. Even my dog steered clear of my office somehow intuitively knowing I was in no mood to play. Not only was the gear up for these events intense and chaotic, but the let down after, not because the event was not successful, but because the energy I spent and absorbed and that worked its way though me, was immense. Believing in Yourself: Intention and Persuasion The term baggage is definitely an overused pop psychology term in our culture. We use it to describe the excesses and useless junk we carry around with us from our worst childhood memories to when our romantic relationships went bad to all manner of past problems we can't seem to shake or get rid of. Storytelling: Pure Emotional Persuasion I cry during movies. I'll admit it. I'm absolutely comfortable with it and not ashamed in the slightest. Stories have been used to elicit emotional responses, whether by design or by accident, since the beginning of man and some of the best stories are extraordinarily moving. That emotion may manifest as heartbreaking or uplifting or revolutionary or life changing-but the important thing to remember is that it is an unbelievably powerful opening-a hole, so to speak-that can be filled up with a message. Layers of Complexity in Life and Persuasion: I Am An Onion I love metaphors. Lately, an especially potent one for me is the layers of an onion as metaphor for human nature. This method, the Cleveland Method, deals with a deep understanding of unconscious motivations and core drives. Only by focusing inwards can we genuinely understand others. The Frame Around The Big Picture One of the absolute, most powerful concepts in persuasion is framing. Looking at the big picture, the broader view of any issue, we can see how everything we can think of is a frame (in one way or another). Sometimes I use political or religious concepts I(as well as an occasional controversial or taboo topic) to illustrate the ways in which framing works. I am not endorsing one side or another but just pointing out where blind spots may be. Unselfconscious Affluence Not all of us grew up with money. In fact, several of my most successful students are real rags to riches stories. It was through single-minded perseverance, education, intention, hard work and a little luck, that the greatest successes have created vast financial universes. Becoming Magnetic A woman I know, an extremely spiritual person, recently shared with me the following: 'I used to have unfortunate beliefs about myself and I received back from external influences unfortunate results. When I decided to take control and raise my resonance, to be the change I wanted to become, to allow abundance and love come flow through me, absolutely everything fell into place. I am now living a life of leisure with a beautiful husband and I can draw what I want into my universe at will.' Manifesting Your Desires with Paper Seeds I lived on my grandpa's farm as a kid and he taught me some very important life lessons including the Biblical verse: As you sow, so shall you reap. Beyond Boxes It's likely everybody reading this, especially if you are in the world of sales, has gone through sales training, learned 'the way' to sell, maybe even the Carnegie method, perhaps features and benefits, or some other easily definable, package-able, pat way to interact with your clients and prospects to try to hammer away at them to buy your product or service. These techniques have boxed many an excellent sales professional in to a certain degree and once I realized I was being hindered by this ineffective type of sales training, I had an awakening. Master of Stories 'Facts and figures are forgotten. Stories are retold.' -Jeffrey Gitomer Polarity Responders: Contrary to All Belief What's a polarity responder? We've all had dealings with them. They are someone who no matter what the situation, statement or issue at hand, has to respond in opposition. 'It's a beautiful day.' Your Prospect's Particulars: Persuasion Continuums Recently I heard a pretty funny joke: 'I have the idea that one person's dream is another person's nightmare. For example, it's my dream to sleep with Cindy Crawford. I'll bet you anything that would be her nightmare.' Powerful Persuasion--Eliciting Peak Emotional States with Music We've all had this experience: a song comes on the radio and we're transported back to a time and place ten, fifteen, twenty years ago or longer. Maybe it was a song that reminded us of a time when we were struggling through a broken heart, or maybe it was just the opposite, the soundtrack for our first true love. Persistence "Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." --Dale Carnegie The Big But I really like you, but. . . The Persuasive Power of Supporting Evidence I got a call from an acquaintance a while back. He said, 'Do you remember the conversation we had about Africa? Well, I checked my e-mail and found, unbelievably, that I won an international lottery which originated in Africa. I'm just convinced that everything happens for a reason, aren't you?' Is it true? Does Everything Happen for a Reason? An acquaintance called a while ago and said, 'Do you remember the conversation we had about Africa? Well, you're not going to believe this, but I just got an e-mail informing me that I've won an international lottery originating in Africa. I'm convinced everything happens for a reason, aren't you?' When Friendlies Attack I like the way Abraham Lincoln said it best, "Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?" Old Fashioned Sales: Features and Benefits There's an old wives' tale that suggests you can tell when dinner is ready by throwing a piece of spaghetti against the wall to see if it sticks. If it sticks, it's done. If not, keep cooking. Whenever I think of 'features and benefits' selling, I think of someone throwing a whole pot of spaghetti noodles against the wall and trying to see what sticks. Stupid, right? I think so. Creating Your Universes: The First Step "Civilization advances as more and more of life's essentials are absorbed by the unconscious." -Diane Ackerman, "An Alchemy of Mind: The Marvel and Mystery of the Brain" Progression Sequence: Back to Bondage "The average age of the world's greatest civilizations has been two hundred years. These nations have progressed through this sequence: From bondage to spiritual faith; from spiritual faith to great courage; from courage to liberty; from liberty to abundance; from abundance to selfishness; from selfishness to complacency; from complacency to apathy; from apathy to dependence; from dependency back again into bondage." --Sir Alex Fraser Tyler (1742-1813) Scottish jurist and historian Breath: Self Fulfilling Prophesy for Persuasion "Simply breathe - deeply and often, and whatever you do, don't stop breathing!" --Cheryl Lynne Rubbo Obviously, we all breathe. In this exercise, you're going to take credit for someone doing this very basic biological function. It's a persuasion tool that can determine how deeply you are in rapport with someone and help to deepen rapport from the start.
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