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Home | Self Improvement | Time Management

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The Function of Gaslighting

By: Kenrick Cleveland..

Here's an example of a very powerful psychological and persuasive strategy called gaslighting.

A few nights ago I was watching TV, just flipping around aimlessly, and came upon an old episode of M*A*S*H. In this episode, BJ is bored and to entertain himself he cooks up a plan for amusement at Winchester's expense.

BJ takes a pair of Winchester's pants and in their place replaces them with a pair two sizes too large. When Winchester eventually puts the pants on, BJ asks if Winchester is okay. He mentions that he's noticed him looking a little under the weather and suggests that he maybe has a virus because he's looking too thin.

A few scenes later BJ replaces the pants with a much smaller pair and when Winchester tries them on, BJ again casually "notices" how much weight Winchester has gained, which sends the vain Winchester into a dieting frenzy.

"What's next?" Hawkeye asks BJ, having observed the whole interaction.

BJ simply responds, "Tomorrow he gets taller."

BJ's prank is a perfect illustration of gaslighting. He, of course, was engaged in a harmless prank. Yet gaslighting has a very nefarious potential. And the main reason I'm writing about it is so that if you find yourself at the receiving end of this technique, you'll know how to protect yourself.

It's important to me that as you read this, you understand that the persuasion techniques I teach must be used with integrity. I've learned the hard way that when they are employed for unethical purposes, there's the very real potential for a world of hurt for all involved.

The 1944 film 'Gaslighting' is where the term came from, ultimately coming to be defined as a ruthless manipulation of a person so that they believe something absolutely untrue.

The gist of the movie is that a husband tries to make his wife seem insane in order to get her out of his way by getting her admitted to a mental hospital. He does this in subtle ways that cause her to doubt her own ability to interpret reality.

Using gaslighting in a way that is not unethical could include understanding how your affluent prospect interprets their own reality.

There are five main strategies employed in the technique of gaslighting and you can use each one to your advantage when persuading your affluent prospects.

The first way to employ this strategy is through the use of repetitive questioning. When you do this, you plant seeds of doubt in the mind of the person you're trying to influence.

Game shows employ this tactic in order to heighten anticipation by causing the contestants to doubt their decisions - asking and re-asking, "are you sure?"

A simple cock of the head, a raising of the eyebrow, and a comment such as, "really?" can install in the recipient, the necessary seed of doubt needed to set them off guard.

This can be very effective when you come at them from the perspective of having only their best interest at heart.

The second strategy used in gaslighting is to point out things that aren't there.

This is a particularly useful strategy in undermining a sense of reality. On the flip side, this can be used just as effectively in pointing out a person's assets and qualities, especially if the person has no idea that this quality exists within them (and even if it doesn't actually exist within them).

For example, appealing to your boss', client's, prospect's or authority figure's sense of vanity or ego can work tremendously.

Warning: if the compliment is completely without merit, an obvious fabrication, then one is sure to be discovered. Subtlety and at least a small nugget of honesty works best here.

The third strategy may be employed by various professionals, experts and/or authority figures. For example, a therapist (or minister, or pychic, or doctor) has specialized or divine access to unseeable information about you - deep, mysterious information that only they know how to reveal and which gives them "the answer" that you seek.

This phenomenon causes the client to lower defenses and be more trusting and dependent. This may be part of the reason patients sometimes develop crushes on their therapists.

The fourth strategy is to reveal the secret thoughts of others.

This is also known as gossip. It's a special kind of gossip which maneuvers in an attempt to give insight. It's just between 'us', it's from me, someone who cares enough to tell you what other people are saying. . .

This can be used with 'nice gossip' i.e. compliments about that person that you weren't supposed to share. It can install positive behavior.

And last, but not least, the final strategy is to use the power of the many against the tiny power of one.

Kids do this all the time. It's employed in politics, religion, and suburbia, through the media, the educational system, and society-at-large in varying degrees.

Orwell called it 'group think' and as the corporations gain more and more control over the distribution of information, it becomes harder and harder to find accurate information, and even harder to stand away from the crowd, especially when you're right.

Ganging up on others is a very powerful tactic. If many others confront you, telling you your position is wrong, it's very difficult to maintain your belief.

Gaslighting isn't nice. It's designed to trick people into self-doubt. And yet, there are positive ways it can be used.

Article Source: http://www.gcyarticles.com

Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of wealthy clients using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion techniques.

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