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The Art of Empathy

By: Kenrick Cleveland..

Empathy is the ability to identify with and the vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another person. Empathy is the capacity to understand and respond to the other's experiences.

This can be a huge benefit when we're persuading.

Here's an exercise to really help you get into the affluent mindset of your clients...

This is about responding to your client or prospect's experiences. In a previous article I wrote about the pink bubble, and how to use that for rapport building. Well, in this exercise, we're going to figuratively experience what they experience.

When someone feels that kind of trust - where you are actually experiencing what they are going through - rapport is never far behind.

By employing this technique, you'll be able to naturally understand and gain deep rapport with someone you don't know very well.

You will need a role play partner for this one.

Here's the exercise: Ask your partner to think of something. Anything. And call it 'A'. As they answer, notice their body, how it's arranged, watch their face, their breathing, their muscle tension, whether they're fidgeting, and take a snapshot in your head of what this looks like. Along with your mental snapshot, say to yourself, 'This is how they represent 'A'.'

Break this state by having them stand up, walk around briefly, and name three things that they can see in the room. . . a coffee cup, photograph, bookshelf. . .etc. This reverts them back to their normal state.

The next step is to have them think of something entirely different--not opposite, just different--and call this thought 'B'.

[NOTE: When you first do this exercise thinking of the opposite may make it easier, but I encourage you to develop your skills and not use something opposite once you've got the hang of it.]

Have them break this state.

Here's where things get interesting. Have them think of either 'A' or 'B'. They're not supposed to tell you which, but you are to figure this out by looking at their expressions, their snapshot.

Switch roles after a few tries and let them experience what you're thinking. This exercise helps you really know the people you're dealing with.

Of course you're not going to practice this and role play with your prospects. This is an exercise to fine-tune your observation skills and should be done with friends or co-workers.

After a while, you will begin to recognize the smallest state changes in others as you converse with them. When they speak about certain topics, give you certain answers, you will actually experience them and they will feel it too.

The feelings this will elicit in your prospect and client might not be easily pinpointed, but they will feel a real connection to you.

What's the point? It's just another way to gain fast and powerful rapport at the same time putting your prospect into a state where they are feeling understood.

You can also use this to determine if someone's lying to you.

If a prospect, for instance, explains that their finances are "great" but their body language belies this, then these verbal and nonverbal cues can be a dead give away that this prospect doesn't really have a steady hold on his finances - and this information can be used to your persuasive advantage.

You can use other persuasive strategies to get this prospect to open up about their financial situation. And once you do that, you gain even more rapport, you get to the heart of their problem, and you can immediately introduce yourself and your service as the solution to their problem.

Article Source: http://www.gcyarticles.com

Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of wealthy clients using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion techniques.

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