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The 'away' Perspective: Persuasion Continuum Of Towards And Away

By: Kenrick Cleveland..

Before I get into the 'away' perspective in the towards/away continuum, I want to make a distinction between a truly negative personality and a person who is inclined towards moving away from a problem.

'If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.' It's one of those things adults say to kids all the time. But I'm of the opinion that not everything has to be nice. Putting a happy face on each and every disappointment, not allowing for the lows in life, takes away from the complexity of experience. I'm not suggesting to not have a good attitude when bad things happen, but life is made up of ups and downs and to deny the downs, cuts us off from feeling how good the ups can feel with something to contrast it to.

However, it is quite difficult to be around people who complain nonstop. When someone around us views the world through inconvenience and misery, it brings us down, especially if we are with them for long stretches of time or on a daily basis. We become depleted trying to combat the negativity.

To me, whether a person is positive or negative is less important than honesty. However, I'm much more interested in being around people who know that their thoughts are manifesting their reality thus tend to attract positive folks.

Okay, so back to the 'towards and away' continuum. Like all continuums this is context specific meaning that where someone may be tremendously 'away' when it comes to health (maybe because they've had a scare and are trying to get away from having another brush with early death), they may be very towards when it comes to security or wealth.

To determine towards and away, we need to elicit our client's criteria. And say it turns out to be financial security. The big question is: Ultimately, what will having financial security do for you?

Security is tricky because it can be both a towards and away answer. The answer is important because it will determine their direction.

If they say, 'Having financial security will mean I'm safe. I won't have to worry anymore about the stock market or how I'm going to retire. . .'

Well. . .this is fairly easy to figure out, isn't it? Is this person move towards something or away from a problem?

This is definitely an away from answer.

I liken the approach to take with away from people as 'backing the ambulance up to the door.' We want to really get them into their fear, like rubbing salt in a wound or poking at a sore tooth. Help them to wallow in this fear and then show them how your product or service equals what they want: financial security.

My response: 'Well, exactly. That's perfectly understandable. Because, really, the stock market is a really terrifying prospect right now. I mean, people have no idea how devastating it's going to be when that thing finally crashes again. And I can totally understand that feeling of sickness and worry. Having no parachute, no safety net, no cushion would definitely be cause for worry. My clients have moved beyond that fear and are naturally safe and secure as a result of working with me.'

Determination of towards/away is a really powerful tool that enriches rapport immeasurably. Don't ever try to force the away oriented person to see the silver lining or look through rose colored glasses. Just go along with them and bask in the fear and horror that you can eventually relieve them of.

Article Source: http://www.gcyarticles.com

Kenrick Cleveland teaches strategies to earn the business of wealthy clients using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion strategies.

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