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Calibrating For Rapport

By: Kenrick Cleveland..

Back, twenty some years ago when I was selling gym memberships, there was a trainer who was a great guy, really funny and sociable, but he just never understood how to communicate with certain people. In a way, he was genuinely himself all the time, but on the other hand this often brought him right up against a wall where he was ineffective in his job.

I could see there was a problem but at the time I didn't have the language to verbalize it to him. He was having a problem calibrating with those around him. Calibration is an aspect of rapport.

Calibrating with others requires us to fine tune our movements, cadence, rhythm, tone (etc.) with whomever we're talking to. If I'm chatting with someone who is of lower energy, someone who sighs a lot or breathes deeply, I will match this level of energy. Likewise, if I'm with a fidgeter, someone whose energy is higher or manic, I will raise my energy to meet theirs.

Calibration also refers to the effect you have on those around you and problems with calibration can manifest in all facets of life. By not noticing the states of those around us, we're missing out on a wealth of information-all this without even a word spoken.

In essence, calibration is akin to a working with a person's energy.

In a recent article I wrote about the exercise of 'trying on someone else's skin'. This explained how to 'become one' with your potential clients or love interests. The reaction I get all the time when I presuppose and visualize this is 'It feels like we've known each other forever.' It's incredibly powerful.

That level of calibration sometimes even allows people to bypass logic and say, 'Wow. It feels like we knew each other in a past life.' Now, I know not all of you subscribe to reincarnation, but think about how this instant level of intimacy/trust can further your persuasion abilities. If the person you're dealing with feels that comfortable with you, then they will most likely feel comfortable doing business with you as well.

Another phenomenal calibration exercise I posted an article about is the concept of surrounding ourselves in pink bubbles. This is a mutual calibration which encompasses both you and your prospect or client and evens out the level of energy between you again creating an instant trust and rapport.

And lastly, in case you missed it, since a lot of us work with groups of people, there is a group rapport building exercise called 'shovel it up, filter it out'. This is hot. I used this in Vegas at a recent seminar with amazing results and response. My energy, instead of being depleted at the end of the day (as is common for me when working with such large groups, was supercharged. (That is, until the end of the third day when I finally sat down and thought, 'Oops. I shouldn't have stopped. It's going to be hard to get back up.')

So go back and check out these posts. You're going to really be able to internalize the importance of calibration in the process of rapport and your results are going to skyrocket.

Article Source: http://www.gcyarticles.com

Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of wealthy prospects using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion techniques.

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